Sit On Your Hands!
Date: Friday, January 25 @ 23:30:27 MST
Topic: Self-Improvement
Have you ever found yourself in a meeting volunteering to do one more thing when you already have too much to do? It’s an interesting thing to observe your hand going up, even though you feel a lot of internal conflict. What could possibly be the cause of this?
There are a number of possible causes. Perhaps you are motivated by empathy for the issues you would be handling. Perhaps you want to feel like you are doing your share. Maybe you feel distress and fear that no one will step up and handle the assignment. You might think that you have expertise that others don’t, and no one else could do as great a job as you. It’s also possible you could have a true desire to take care of the task. Perhaps you simply want to please others.
The first recommendation is to sit on your hands so that you won’t compulsively volunteer. While sitting on your hands, do what you can to breathe deeply. Tell yourself, "If no one else volunteers, I can always do so after the meeting or next week." Ask yourself the following questions.
- Is it realistic, with my current schedule to add another time commitment?
- If not, is there another time commitment I could easily give up to make time to take this on?
- If I take this on, will I regret it later, deeply regret it?
- Have I already contributed extensively to this organization or to the community?
- What will happen to my social life or family life if I do volunteer?
- What will this cost me in terms of my own rest and rejuvenation?
- Do I genuinely want to do this?
Now, after asking yourself all these questions, there’s a good chance that someone else may have volunteered.
Ask yourself these questions and truly assess both the impact of the volunteering on your life, and the genuineness of your desire. Once that is clear, if you decide that you really do want to volunteer, go ahead. Taking that little bit of extra time to think it through will keep you in charge of your life and your schedule. Get out of the habit of volunteering automatically without thinking it through.
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Suzi Elton is a success coach working with "difference makers" who are ready to effect positive change by living their highest life purpose. She has coached hundreds of clients to approach their goals strategically through tiny steps that bring about quantum leaps. For free Life Purpose exercises, go to MyLifePurposeCoaching.com
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